Infomercials are known for a common phrase: “Wait…there’s more!” So it is with the warning signs of dating Mr. or Ms. Wrong. Warning signs stick out. They don’t fit into the landscape on purpose. If the cliff sign blended in with its surroundings, more people would swerve off the road.
Just as we need warning signs on the highways, they’re also needed on the road towards relationships. God sends us warning signs all the time, but we don’t always pay attention. Warning signs are only as powerful as they are heeded. Are you dating Mr. or Ms. Wrong?
For those that missed the first 6 warning signs you can read them here (6 Warning Signs You Are Dating Mr. or Ms. Wrong)
Warning Sign #7) He or she has become incompatible with you.
“Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” (Amos 3:3).
Sometimes you might not gel with another person. It’s not that they are “wrong”; they may be the “wrong” person for you and your personality. Many times young couples find themselves thrust together by well-meaning friends and family. However the spark or enduring interest remains aloof. It may be time to step away even though you may enjoy some aspects of the relationship.
Warning Sign #8) He or she is drawn towards questionable friendships.
“Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character’” (1 Corinthians 15:33).
You may be with the wrong person if they find themselves more comfortable with unbelievers than they are with believers. There’s nothing wrong with having friends who aren’t believers—how will many of them come to the Lord if we don’t first befriend them? However, if your significant other has more affinity for worldly friends than Christian ones—he or she is soon to be drawn further from God. If you ignore this warning sign, you too may find yourself one day farther from your relationship with God in order to appease him or her.
Warning Sign #9) He or she lacks balance in the relationship.
“And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:29).
You don’t want to be involved in a relationship with there is constant neediness nor neglect. There should be a balance where God is the most needed and significant part of your time together. For some, this may not be the season for a relationship if God is calling you towards full time ministry. For others, there’s may be too much focus on a person meeting their needs rather than leaning on Christ. Either way, relationships need to find their balance in order to work.
Warning Sign #10) He or she handles their anger inappropriately and/or ungodly.
“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires” (James 1:19-20).
Any man or woman who is out of control when they are angry—need deliverance! There’s no excuse for this type of behavior in a believer. Jesus demonstrated a righteous anger and we experience this when dealing with injustice, persecution, or the abuse of children. However many people haven’t dealt with unresolved anger and it seeps out without their ability to control it. Even if your significant other doesn’t demonstrate this anger towards you yet…it is a warning sign that you must heed.
Warning Sign #11) He or she isn’t generous towards you.
“A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed” (Proverbs 11:25).
A generous man or woman isn’t necessarily wealthy. Rather they are people accustomed to giving their time, energy, or money in good faith. In contrast, a stingy partner lacks the capability to freely give to others. This stunts their spiritual and emotional growth in a relationship. It will become tiring trying to earn your worth and value. There’s nothing wrong with being wise and prudent in saving or investments. However, as the Lord gives grace—there should be much grace in your relationship.
Warning Sign #12) He or she resists committing to a church.
“Not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching” (Hebrews 10:25).
It’s possible to watch a sermon faithfully on the TV or Internet and grow in your knowledge of God. However by committing to a church, there are ample opportunities to use your spiritual gifts in serving the body of Christ. A man or woman making excuses about not joining a church is walking either in ignorance or disobedience. Your relationship will only grow and mature spiritually when you both are committed to a ministry.
Watch the Warning Signs!
People aren’t perfect. We are flawed in our sinful nature and need the cleansing power of the Holy Spirit to help us live together. There is a Mr. or Ms. Right for you in God’s timing and purpose. The best warning sign to look for is the discernment that comes from God. You will either have His peace or not. Be willing to pay attention to the warning signs with a gentle and discerning spirit from the Lord.
Article by Crystal McDowell
Crystal McDowell is a writer, speaker, and teacher with a passion to encourage believers to know and grow in their relationship with Jesus Christ through practical application of God’s word.
Crystal and her husband, Marshall, raise their five children in the Bloomington, IL. As a freelance writer and editor for over 13 years, Crystal has published numerous Christian curriculums for Sunday School and VBS as well as many articles dealing with marriage, motherhood, and relationships. She’s a weekly staff writer for www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com as well as writing her own blog at http://crystalmcdowellspeaks.blogspot.com.
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