7 Signs Your Dating Relationship Might Not Work Out

It would be nice to know at the beginning of a relationship if it’s going to work out or not. Many have experienced the disappointment of putting a lot of time and energy into a dating relationship that was disappointing. Yet the truest sorrow isn’t that it didn’t work; rather the sadness is for those who continue in a lifeless dating relationship for the sake of being in one. God has created us for greater purposes even in our relationships. Discover the 7 signs that your dating relationship might not work out:

#1) Not enough interest in dating

“I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord” (1 Corinthians 7:32).

There are single people in the Lord who aren’t interested in dating. Their focus is on the Lord’s work and they find it fulfilling enough to not want to be in a relationship. It’s important to be honest with true feelings of disinterest so as to not waste the time of a friend who may want more out of the relationship.

#2) Takes too much time away from spiritual disciplines

“Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers” (1 Timothy 4:16).

A healthy dating relationship doesn’t infringe on personal times of prayer, Bible study, or fellowship with other believers. When a dating relationship takes away time with God, it may not be in the best interest of either person. There needs to be a healthy balance so that allow individual spiritual growth as well as a dating companion.

#3) Lack of mutual attraction

“Jacob was in love with Rachel and said, “I’ll work for you seven years in return for your younger daughter Rachel” (Genesis 29:18).

Jacob was immediately enamored with Rachel and willing to work 14 years in order to marry her. While most people don’t necessarily know right away that their dating relationship will ultimately end in marriage—many recognize right away if there is a mutual attraction to each other. This attraction isn’t limited to the physical appearance, but that also of spiritual, emotional, and/or intellectual appeal.

#4) Spiritual inequity

“Therefore let us move beyond the elementary teachings about Christ and be taken forward to maturity, not laying again the foundation of repentance from acts that lead to death, and of faith in God” (Hebrews 6:11).

Obviously a dating relationship with an unbeliever can cause many problems for a believer. However dating someone who is spiritually immature can also bring a wealth of issues for a couple. This type of immaturity is more apparent in people who refuse to grow up in their faith and will tend to bring down those who have the desire to press forward.

#5) Unresolved connections with previous relationships

“Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead” (Philippians 3:13).

Many times believers have connected themselves either physically or emotionally to someone else in the past. This will cause numerous issues of trust that will continue to infiltrate a growing relationship. There must be a willingness to sever past relationships in order the dating connection to be made. If not, it’s best to walk away or run!

#6) Not interested in the same activities

“Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification” (Romans 14:19).

Experiencing constant friction over activities to do together is a good sign that this dating relationship may not work out. There needs to be a mutual edification in social pursuits in order to know how your relationship will grow. Over the test of time, one of the parties will become more resistant to regular engagements and could cause resentment in the other.

#7) Pressure from other people to keep dating when either or both parties want to stop

“So I strive always to keep my conscience clear before God and man” (Acts 24:16).

Family and friends typically mean well when they attempt to bring together two people who may share similarities. The couple may need to first be honest with each other and then establish boundaries with outsiders. In any long term relationship—other people will always be on the outside. Therefore, there must be a connection without outside influences.

Pay Attention to the Signs!

Through the Holy Spirit, believers can sense the red flags when it comes to dating relationships. Be patient and wait on the Lord to give you clarity before rushing into something that may be more pain than pleasure in the long term. You can trust the Lord to lead you to the right person in time.

Article by Crystal McDowell

Crystal McDowell is a writer, speaker, and teacher with a passion to encourage believers to know and grow in their relationship with Jesus Christ through practical application of God’s word.  

Crystal and her husband, Marshall, raise their five children in the Bloomington, IL. As a freelance writer and editor for over 13 years, Crystal has published numerous Christian curriculums for Sunday School and VBS as well as many articles dealing with marriage, motherhood, and relationships. She’s a weekly staff writer for www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com as well as writing her own blog at http://crystalmcdowellspeaks.blogspot.com.